I am
within ten pounds of breaking 300. Just
ten pounds to go, but (Ugh!) I am
currently on a plateau—my longest time in the doldrums yet. It’s amazing how one’s body can retain weight;
it’s baffling trying to understand what the body is doing. It seems like a simple, calculable problem of
thermodynamics—energy ingested minus energy exerted equals an expected weight
loss—and in the long run it may end up that way but, as many dieters and
exercisers can tell you, it often doesn’t turn out that way!
I think
it must have to do with stress and hunger hormone, water retention, and the building
of heavier lean body mass. Whatever it
be, when you’ve eaten a week’s full of 1,600 calorie days and worked out for
six straight days, as I did, it’s literally stunning to see that familiar figure
displayed on the bathroom scale. There
was I was, a stinging in my eyes when I read the number; and, in fact, I shed a
silent, manly tear when I realized that all the work of the past week, if not
for naught, didn’t add up to a subtraction in weight.
It’s
like setting off on a long road trip in the dark: you don’t know where you’re going, but you
think you know the right direction; you are going full-out hard, because you’re
trying to meet goals along the way. You’re
not reckless in how you proceed, trying to be safe as possible; but it’s
dangerous by its very nature, and you risk bodily harm that could occur at any
moment. Finally, you pull off to the
side of the road to stop and check how far down the road you are, only to find
out that you’ve made a big circle and, making no progress. You are where you started!—that’s how it
feels.
Comparing
our various “sorenesses” with a friend today after group, I made the connection
between all the aches and tightness in my gluts and leg muscles to the tough
new exercises that Laurie has incorporated into her circuit. Where a couple of months ago I was swinging a
25lb kettle ball and doing seconds of speed squats, I’m now doing multiple
minutes of speed squats throughout the session and am flipping up the big 45lb
kettle ball! It’s an increase in weight
and duration that corresponds to an increase in my muscle mass and
endurance.
This
week, instead of becoming blue due to not drawing closer to 300, I am taking
solace in how much fitter I’m becoming.
Because this journey’s never been about getting skinny, it’s about
becoming healthy, and healthy is how I shall continue!
Mark I am so proud of you....I knowill the demons that come with food addiction and depression....it takes a strong resolve to fight those demons and win!
ReplyDeleteThank you! I appreciate all your support!! I'm faking it 'til I make it and taking it one day at a time!
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